This deployment, while certainly not the worst of them, still sucks. This time, I know that there may be whole weeks that pass before I get a single email from Sid, and I know that he won't be able to call home even once a week. But that doesn't mean it's easy.
He emailed me some pictures when he hit port, and they had the opposite effect he was hoping for, I think. I got jealous. I got downright pissed that he was somewhere so beautiful, drinking wine and watching flamenco dancing, while the most exciting thing to happen to me in recent days was having the mailman drop off my Netflix movies.
I told him as much, when he deigned to call home for a few minutes. Really, I've got no right to complain about the short telephone calls. At least he calls. A five minute phone call maybe once a week is the most human contact I have outside of the cashier at the grocery store.
My fucking god, how sorry is that.
I can go a full damn week without hearing another person's voice.
Cory comes over as often as he can, but it's unfair to expect an 18 year old guy to stop by a woman's house if there's no sex involved. Let's be honest. I'd never fuck him. He knows it. And he's got things he needs to do besides come over twice or three times a week to entertain another dude's wife, and eat popcorn and watch crime documentaries.
So be it. I'll eat popcorn and watch crime documentaries alone.
I'm just so fucking lonely! God, I hate typing that. But it's the truth.